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.I can recall the distinct smell of death inside the condo.The very last moment of this morning’s dream was the front door opening, and Steve lurching to the door, trying to get at whatever had opened it.We’re off in a few minutes.All the preparations are made, and the vehicles are running outside to warm up.I’m gonna hit save, and close the laptop, and finally go home.I hope for once, my dreams don’t come true.-AdrianMarch 26th (2nd entry)I can’t sleep.I’m afraid to dream.I’m afraid they’ll come true on me again.I don’t know how to wrap my feeble soldier brain around this bullshit anymore.I’m fucking done with trying to figure this out.I’m fucking done with cryptic messages, and indecipherable nightmares.I want to wake up tomorrow next to Cassie and realize this was all just the worst dream anyone has ever had.But that’s not in the cards eh? Nope.Not for me.It’s almost 11pm.Abby and Patty are downstairs, fighting to stay awake in case I do something stupid.Gilbert came back here to the campus with us to make sure I didn’t kill anyone, or myself.I’m not feeling suicidal, but I’m glad he’s here.I feel like if something happened, I could not give a shit, and still be okay for tonight.Not giving a shit is about all I’ve got left in me anyway tonight.I’m struggling enough to give a shit about writing this.I need to write this.I NEED to write this.I’ve sat here for fifteen minutes trying to figure out how to write what happened today in a manner that does it justice.I’ve started it five times, and erased it five times.I’ve said nice things, I’ve said mean things, I’ve said some insulting things, but the more I think about it, I just need to say it as simply as possible, and then deal with whatever comes out of me.Deep breath in.Enter.Tab.Type it.I shot Steve in the face today.Once more for the people in the back row.My best friend Steve.I shot him in the face today.He was already dead.But I shot him anyway.He was going to eat me.I don’t think he wanted to either.That’s not fair.I KNOW he didn’t want to eat me.I’ll explain how I know that in a second.Town was empty again today.I don’t know why.We’ve left plenty of undead behind on our previous jaunts.Just going by population there should still be thousands of them in the vicinity.There’s no rational reason for them to have disappeared, unless someone else, somewhere else is making a LOT of noise, and has attracted them away.I guess that’s a pretty fucking rational possibility.I get the impression that’s not the case.I get the feeling the “powers that be” are orchestrating events every now and again.I think the past few days they’ve purposefully parted the “dead sea” for us to make this little pilgrimage.The more I think about it, the more that seems like the most rational thing that could be happening.The books? Gotta be something up above (or down below) that’s making this happen.Why I am less scared of that reality, than I am of this being some virus, or radiation, or government experiment? Maybe it’s because knowing that there is some kind of higher power out there somewhere makes me think that there is some kind of real and true chance that we can pull out of this.We can appease a higher power, but can’t talk our way out of the plague.I think today is the day I finally start believing in faith.Really.And here’s why;We arrived at my house at about 9am.The sunlight was exactly like I envisioned in my dream last night.It was a sunny spring-esque day, and the air outside was cool and a little damp from all the melting snow.You know that faintly earthy smell of spring? When the grass starts digging down into the earth to grow? It smelled like that this morning.We backed the trucks into the parking lot and set them up so we could jump in and drive out in a hurry if need be.All four of us got out of the vehicles and checked the lower level of buildings in the complex to ensure that there were no undead about.Abby and Patty checked the windows of the units on the lower level and spotted a few undead milling about inside here and there, but they were lucky enough to not get their attention
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