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.’‘Loops,’ said Jamie.‘Please,’ Anna prompted, waiting patiently.‘Please.’‘Good.Good talking, Jamie.’ She went to the cupboard and got out a packet, opened it and gave it to him.With a brief transient smile, Jamie took them and retreated back to the lounge.Mariner had watched the whole exchange with interest.‘So that’s what all those pictures are about,’ he said, thinking back to the line drawings in Eddie’s house.‘They help Jamie to make sense of what goes on around him.He finds pictures easier to understand than words.It’s why he had the picture of the girl.Kay, Kerry or whatever.’Meaning that the girl had been a feature of their lives.Suddenly, Mariner saw her understand that fact, and she didn’t like it a bit.As a distraction, Mariner picked up one of the longer strips.‘So what’s this? A whole sentence?’Anna shook her head.‘That’s Jamie’s timetable.It helps him to predict what’s going to happen next during each day.He finds it hard to handle change, so the pictures act as a kind of early warning system to let him know what’s coming up.’Mariner studied the pictures.‘Okay, the breakfast cereal, the car and the day centre I understand, but I don’t remember it snowing today.’‘It’s not snow, it’s a snowflake.’‘Of course.’ Clear as mud.‘A snowflake stands for “something unexpected”,’ Anna explained, with exaggerated patience.‘Eddie and Francine were trying to get Jamie used to the idea that sometimes there are events you can’t predict, that you have to be prepared for the unknown.That’s what the snowflake means.Something unknown is going to happen.I wasn’t sure what we were going to do this evening; hence the snowflake.’‘Clever stuff,’ said Mariner.‘You two are beginning to behave like the odd couple.’‘Yes, well, as long as he doesn’t get too comfortable,’ retorted Anna immediately.‘I’ve started looking into long term residential care for him.’‘Oh.’‘Unfortunately, I’m coming up against the same thing as Eddie.They want to use medication if necessary.’‘So, why bother? He seems pretty settled here.I’d have thought…’‘My God, don’t you start!’ she cut in, accusingly.‘Start what?’‘Trying to make me feel guilty.’Although it was obvious that she didn’t need his help.‘I wasn’t…’ he began.But she wasn’t listening.‘And if one more person tells me how “wonderful” Eddie was with Jamie, I’ll strangle them with my bare hands.There, I’m confessing to that one in advance.’‘I’ll make a note of it,’ Mariner said, evenly, holding her gaze.She kept eye contact, but he could see the inner struggle going on, as she fought to keep a lid on her emotions.‘I just want to get on with my life,’ she said, her voice breaking ever so slightly.‘Is that so unreasonable?’‘Of course not,’ said Mariner.‘You have no idea what it’s like.Only two weeks ago I had a job, friends, a social life.I did all the things that normal, independent adults do.I got up, went to work, stayed late if I wanted to, went to the pub afterwards if I wanted to, ate what I liked, saw who I liked.As a matter of fact, I wouldn’t blame Eddie for seeing a prostitute,’ she went on.‘There’s bugger all opportunity for any other kind of love life with Jamie around.He’s been with me less than a fortnight and I’ve become a social pariah.’ In a visible effort to hold it all together, she pushed back her chair and strode the length of the kitchen to bang down her mug in the sink.When she spoke again her voice was a whisper.‘I can’t go back to that.I should, but I can’t.’Mariner watched a single tear escape in a wet trail down her cheek, before she turned away from him, pretending to be fascinated by the view from the window that she saw many times each day.But he could see from the movement of her shoulders that the battle had been lost.Mariner felt he ought to do something, but he wasn’t sure what.He’d never been much good at this stuff.Prepared for rejection, he went over to her and rested his hands lightly on her shoulders.‘I’m sorry,’ he said.‘I really didn’t mean to…’But the rest was left unsaid as she turned and clutched at him, all the pent-up stress and emotion of the past days pouring out in great wrenching sobs, her head pushing into his chest, while Mariner held her, breathing her in.Sod professionalism, he thought.After a while her crying subsided and she stepped back from him, rubbing angrily at her eyes.‘Oh God, I’m so sorry, that was stupid.’Mariner could think of several words to describe the experience, but stupid wasn’t one of them.‘It’s been a tough time,’ he said, inadequately.She managed a short, staccato laugh.‘You can say that again.’ She took a gulp of air.‘The irony is,’ she went on, ‘that this is the last thing in the world Mum and Dad would have wanted.They knew first hand what hard work Jamie is.They never intended for either Eddie or me to have to take care of him.Look out for him, yes, of course, but not wash him, dress him, feed him, clean his teeth, day in, day out.They didn’t expect that of us.It’s always people on the outside who make the judgements.’‘I wasn’t judging you,’ said Mariner truthfully.‘Oh, it’s not your fault…’ She tailed off, exhausted and spent.‘Sorry, I’ve made your shirt wet.’ She patted the damp patch and Mariner thought her touch would burn a hole in his chest.‘That’s all right, I’ve got another one at home,’ he said casually, stepping away so that she wouldn’t notice the effect she was having on him.‘Not in that colour I hope.’ Mariner took the weak attempt at humour as a good sign.‘’Fraid so,’ he said
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